24 November 2008
The First Birthday
Posted by Nadene under: Nadene's Thoughts .
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Our family had a unique situation with my mom’s birthday because she shared the birthday with my dad. Yes, they were born on the same day a year apart. So this first birthday didn’t have as much sting as it would have in my opinion because the day did not simply go from “significant” to “just another day”. We still had something to celebrate: my dad! So we went to Tony’s on the pier and had a grand meal. We still missed my mom and wish she could have been here to celebrate another year of life. It was kind of interesting for me though, I think I felt more thankful for my dad and his life at that moment than I probably have felt in the past and I was able to enjoy our meal. I took some time later to allow myself to grieve over my mom not being there. In a way I was able to seperate the two and therefore have a balance between joy for my father and grief for my mother.
All of these things are new experiences, things I am figuring out as I go. There is no set path in grief, there are books but they only tell you that there’s no one way greif goes, you just have to experience it and go through it. I agree completely with my brother’s post about the holidays. I couldn’t have said it better myself. Our family is now one less and it is not easy trying to get used to thinking of “we” as only three people.
Nadene